Look, America, if the way we learned history back in the day, was good enough for your granpappy, if it was good enough for me, then dang it, it's good enough for you!
The probum with all this new-fangled LERNIN and stuff - people tryna teach you things that actually happened back in the past and stuff, is that you gonna end up learnin stuff that you jus' don't wanna know! I mean, seriously, you jus' don't wanna know it, so you shouldn't have to. And now I'm gonna protect your freedom here, your freedom to not know stuff!
So, here's my proposal for colleges: Stop teachin' bad stuff!
By bad stuff, I mean stuff that people don't wanna know! You know, like that slavery was as bad as it actually was. Jus' don't teach that. People don't wanna know that bad stuff, you know?
Just teach the basic stuff, like that everything was better in the past. That's what you should be teachin. Teach people that since everything was better in the past, then we can cheer and feel good about everything today.
Besides, teachin' bad history isn't gonna have any affect on what happens today. you know, 'cuz it's so long ago. Stuff that happened so long ago don't have any bearing on what happens today. At least that's what I think, and if I can think it, you can too!
Now, let's look at this here A.P. Black history course that I cancelled. That course was WOKE!
Now, you all know what I mean when I use that word WOKE! Right? I mean, I have no idea what WOKE is, but I know it's bad, so I can just call stuff WOKE and everyone knows that stuff is bad! WOKEY POKEY DOKEY?
What stuff is WOKE? Anything that teaches history that was bad. I mean, sure bad stuff happened in the past, but that doesn't mean we should KNOW it! Cuz, you know, everything was better in the past, at least in the past that I know about.
So...I've decided what colleges and universities can teach.
Now, some people come up to me and they say, "Hey, Guv! There's experts at these places, experts who know more than anyone else about certian things. Experts gotta be allowed to teach what they know!"
Ridiculous!
Experts are WOKE!
Experts are people who have an agenda.
What is their agenda?
To TEACH you stuff!
Ridiculous!
Woke!
No more!
No more teachin stuff.
AND...I'm banning books! All of them! No more readin'! Why do people read, anyway? readin' is WEIRD! All the books I've banned are weird books. No more!
And don't question what you're taught. Just believe it, like I do. That way you can be jus like everyone else...NORMAL!
Be the same as everyone else. If everyone else can be normal and the same, and not have have any weird thoughts in their head, then you can do it too!
I'm here to protect your RIGHTS! Protect your rights to not know stuff. Protect your rights to not be subjected to the information taught by the WOKE MOB! Protect your rights to only know the history that I know about!
Stay normal America!
Be the same as everyone else!
Stop tryna be smart and weird, you weird readin' weirdos!
Peter Wick
February 14, 2023
